Sunday, January 14, 2007

David Pincus Where Are You?

It seems fitting that my first posting will be of no concern to anybody. Well, anybody except myself and the name-sake of this story. It also seems fitting that I should make my web debut with a brief yarn about my debut into adulthood... That is, the vices of adulthood.
Somewhere on the North Shore of Chicago many years ago, though not that many, two long-haired boys of ten in short-pants and knee socks sat in a musty basement listening to records. One of the boys, having the advantage of two older sisters and divorced parents, was far more a man of the world than the other. The worldly boy-wonder was David Pincus. I was the other. Pincus reached for an album I had never seen.
"This one is my sister's," he explained. "And it's really cool."
He handed me a white, double album, the cover illustrated with an ink drawing of bricks. In fact the lines of bricks with their alternating vertical lines filled both covers.
"Cool," I said. "It looks kinda like the White Album... Only with bricks." I was a Beatle fan.
"It's better," David assured me.
I opened the double album to see what was inside. What was inside startled me: Pellets. Dozens of tiny pellets rolled out of the album like Lilliputians fleeing the giant who's really a ten year old kid.
"What the hell are those?" I asked confused.
David panicked. "Oh shit!" He said as if I had just accidentally set his house on fire. "Those are my sister's pot seeds!"
I thought about this, trying to understand if this meant his house was indeed on fire. Those words ricocheted around my head for a minute: "My sister's pot seeds." The truth was that on their own, individually, I could define each of those words with ease. But assembled in that context they meant the same as "my mother's dish plant."
It was no secret that David, worldy and wise, knew more about the complexities of the planet than I, or most people in general on the North Shore. So I fessed up.
"What are your sister's pot seeds?"
He explained. I understood. Though I wondered what effect being in such close proximity to marijuana seeds would have on my ability to finish the 5th grade. Pot, as they said at the time, is a gateway drug, a seed narcotic (if you will), that ultimately compels one to try angel dust and eventually murder your parents for a few dollars to pay a pusher for more.
We listened to The Wall... twice before I went home for dinner and silently contemplated David's sister walking down the street with a handful of strange seeds, purchased from a man who promised her that if planted, would sprout a beanstalk guaranteed to grow high. Very high.
David moved to Milwaukee in the 6th grade. But not before introducing my palate to the sophisticated tastes of beer (Neer Beer), Pink Floyd, Marlboros, Oui Magazine and a few other vices too private, bizarre and/or humiliating to mention here. He was Bar Mitzvah'd on his 13th birthday somewhere outside of Milwaukee. I remember it well. My parents drove me up there in a violent and treacherous blizzard in which we nearly died. That's why I remember his birthday. January 14th.
Happy Birthday, Pincus.

3 comments:

Pinkyreggae said...

Where is David Pincus? I'm right here you Fu@$er! :) My wife got me a nice tobacco pipe for my birthday this year, solid wood and with a flat bottom so you can stand it up without it falling to the side and losing your cherry. Very nice gift. But this 'shout out' beats it (I paused long there, but it's been about 10 years since you and Gary Rosen were cutting 'Totally Confused' (yes?) up in Milwaukee and called me at 3:00 AM to invite me over to the studio. So this is a slightly better gift than the pipe.

We were indeed the original living South Park kids, Jewish Illinois Suburb version. Fond memories of picking on Deepak in gym class, not just because he had darker than average skin due to his Indian heritage (ouch!) but also because he was very strange and would act funny if you chased him. I remember Micheal Rosenbergs older brother and his friends who would hog tie Michael and shoot him in the fac with yellow pellot guns. I rember their careful experimentation to find the perfect distance at which to shoot, inflicting the maximum emotional and physical pain. I remember our smallest friend, Brad Baum, taking on older and much larger kids in fights, only to be pinned down on his back and punched in the face again and again and again.

Your blog brings back to me the experience of being a 10 year old boy again, lacking in conscience, living in the context of a suburban lord of the flies. Nice!

Thanks again for the honor and birthday wish! I'll be in touch through e-mail now that I know you're living just north of me in Hollywierd

-David Pincus

Unknown said...

Wow- that was fast- I don't think detective Goren could've found David Pincus any faster.

Anonymous said...

Knowing the elder Rosenberg brothers I am not surprised to read Pincus' memory. At all. G - I promise that Michael is indeed alive and that I haven't assumed his identity (although we both had a quite a laugh at the thought). He's writing you - I swear!